Jacqui Thomas - Live your life your way

There is actually a big difference between having a great lifestyle and a great life – but the two can easily become confused.

“Lifestyle” refers to things we buy to decorate our lives. Through our lifestyle choices we can buy an identity through brands. We can define how other people perceive us, so it can be a way of gaining acceptance and approval from them. A common term for this is “keeping up with the Joneses”. We want to control what people think of us and it can be tempting to do this through making sure we have the right “things” in order to be regarded in a certain way.

Your “life” on the other hand, is what you lead when you know what is important to you and you let that control your behaviour. Your life is made up of your choices and actions. Through our “life” we can create our own self esteem and pride through being true to our selves.

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The very first step in creating your ideal life is to get very clear on what it looks like. This isn’t rocket science, it’s just much easier to get what you want if you know what that is.

Take some time to sit down and really think about this. If you could have your ideal life in 3, 6 or even 12 months time, what does it look like? Where are you living? What are you doing? Who is around you? What do you do in your spare time? How much money do you have? What do you look like? Read More

Have you set yourself some really big goals this year? Something you really want to achieve, but have no idea how yet? Is there a danger it might end up going in the “too-hard” basket and ending up back on the New Year’s resolution list again next year? 

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Are you suffering from overwhelm?  Do you ever wish the world would stop so you can get off?  Do you feel like your life is just one never-ending circle?  It might be time to simplify.

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Are you the sort of person who sets the same New Year’s resolutions year after year and never actually makes them happen?  Maybe you set yourself goals with the best intentions but run out of enthusiasm halfway, or maybe you never even manage to get started?

One of the big secrets to successful goal setting is to set goals that you want to achieve.  That might sound like its too easy, but who said it had to be difficult?  Sure achieving your goals will require some effort from you, but you’re much more likely to commit to making that effort if you are working towards something that you really want for yourself.  So that means sorting out the ‘want to’ goals from the ‘should” goals.

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Many clients come to me in despair with problems and issues that actually belong to other people – partners, children, friends, family members, work colleagues.  Often they’ve tried to get these people to change their offending behaviour and failed.  And therein lies the problem.  We can’t change other people, nor do we have any right to.  People will change if and when they want to and not a moment sooner.

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I was reminded the other day of a story I was told a few years ago.  It was about a speaker who pulled a crisp, fresh $100 note out of his pocket and offered it to his audience.  “who would like this $100 note?” he asked.  Of course nearly everyone was keen to accept it with hands waving madly in the air.  “What about this $100 note?” he asked offering a more worn, dirtier looking note, instead.  Still the same people responded, happy to accept the money.  Then he took the worn, dirty note, screwed it up in a ball and stood on it, squashing it into the ground.  When he picked it up, the $100 was barely recognisable but still he offered it to the crowd and still he was met with the same enthusiastic response.  No matter what he did to that piece of paper, it still held it’s same true value, it was still worth $100.

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Most people probably know that it’s beneficial to think positive.  To really reap the rewards, you need to take that a step further, though.  It’s not just about “thinking” positively, you need to “feel” positive.

We’ve all heard sayings such as “you reap what you sow” and “you get out what you put in”.  The basis behind these is that what we put out into the Universe is what we attract back.  So if you’re putting positive stuff out, you will attract good stuff back, and if you’re putting negative stuff out then you will attract more of the same.

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Are you one of those people that has several projects on the go and wonders why none of them are coming to fruition very quickly?  Maybe you’re spreading your focus too thinly.  Multi tasking can be helpful in some situations but it can also be counter-productive.

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If you want to be successful, you have to take more risks.  By this I don’t mean being reckless, I simply mean that in order for you to truly succeed you have to risk failure.

This is one of the big differences between people who are successful and those that aren’t.  Successful people dare to win, while not being afraid to fail.  Most people are terrified of failure so don’t step out of their comfort zones to take risks, and therefore never really dare to succeed.  The true potential of most people is severely limited by their fear of failure.

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